My This Life

Resisting Temptation

2008-06-25T10:28:00.000+08:00

I'm so proud of myself last night. I did not give in to temptation like I normally does these days.

After watching movie "Get Smart" @ Vivo, we dropped Ming off. On the way home it's convenient for me to suggest to VV to have a drink @ Vila Bali. But I didn't.

Then another 'evil' thought striked. I almost wanted to ask her to grab a beer @ 7-Eleven @ her block void deck.

But I resisted yet again!

Bravo to my achievement! Bravo to a step closer to a healthier body, better figure. Bravo I saved at least S$10 from the beer!

Cheers!

Operation

2007-09-08T19:14:00.000+08:00

On 5/9/07 - I'd an operation @ Gleneagles.
The night before I didnt sleep well. If you ask me if I was afraid, I wasnt exactly.
Was I worried? I was alittle. I was worried of complication. I was worried of what if....

On the other hand, I know I've to get it done as quickly as possible.
I cant sit & wait & hope it will heal by itself, it won't.

Dami didnt want to accompany me to the hospital initially when I told him about the op.
Maybe because of PMS, I got v emotional, I cried & cried & cried.
His reason was he has a flight to catch & therefore cant see me to the hospital.
And he argued that I said I'll arrange for my sis to accompany me.

But that was before I knew his flight is actually 12pm!
When I told him I need to be admitted @ 7.30am & surgery @ 10.30am, he didnt volunteer.
I told him is the thought that matters.

He called me the day before the op. He asked me how I am going to the hospital the next day.
I said: "Take bus, by myself lor".
By then my emotion has calmed down. It didnt matters anymore if he's going w me, of cos it'll be bonus if he did.

God grant me that bonus, he said it's so pathetic to check in on my own that he'll go w me.
So we took a cab there. On the 7th floor where the day wards are, there're 2 people seated @ the lobby. I went to pay the deposit & watched tv for awhile before the nurse called me in to get ready.

Kissed Dami goodbye, I started the journey alone. I was thinking how am I going to pass this 2 hrs....(8.30-10.30am) I thought it would be a long wait, I was wrong.

The nurse got me to change, asked my a list of questions, I made 2 phone calls to Apple & VV. Before I know it, I'm been wheeled to the operation theatre.

Now it has been 4 days. I'm healing well.
Received gifts from colleagues/friends really cheer me up!
Thank God for his blessing!

Picasso & The Vollard Suite

2007-07-02T15:06:00.000+08:00

Finally we made it to the art exhibition on 30.06.2007.
Mingming, Pucca & I went. Mei was sick so couldnt join us last minute.

After the art exhibition, we went BrusselsSprouts for lunch.
1st time for Pucca who loves the place & the mussels, I'm glad.

Met up w Dami @ Tong Building. Went to attend a time-share talk with him which he agreed w/o my consent. Showed a terribly black face, the sales person released us in less than 15mins.

He wanted to get a pair of shoes from Timberland but Metro Paragon doesnt have his size. So we left for Vivo. He was the woman that day & I was the man. He shop, try & buy. Me just standing around giving advice & carried bags when he went into fitting room.

We went to a Nonya restaurant for Asam Curry Fishhead which was our favourite.
In total he bought a shirt from Timberland, a shirt & pants from Esprit. I bought him a boxer short & a t-shirt from Metro. It was nice shopping as a man's role once in awhile.

Before going home, we went Gloria Jean for coffee.

42Kgs

2007-06-20T23:34:00.000+08:00

Dinner tonight is another round of yong tou fu.
I'm very please with myself.
My goal of 42kgs still seems far away though.
But I'm going to keep trying. At least I aim for the sky.
Even if I don't hit my target, I'm still achieve high.

Dami is really too much. I'm very disappointed with him.
As usual I'm the one who will call him & ask if he had his meal.
Yet he never ask me back! I should pamper myself more.
I deserve it!

I thought today is the beginning of Mango sales.
Went by during lunch to Centrepoint branch, only to realise they are open for those with invitation card :(

I'll have to wait till tomorrow to find out if there's any good buy. Had lunch with Peggy the temp staff today. She's a nice & simple girl. Hardly can find such plain girl these days.

On the way home, Mei called me. She exclaimed excitingly that she has something to share with me. Of course w/o guessing I know what it is. Ah Siao proposed. In her bedroom. Haha I told her why so unromantic? She said nvm. She's too thrilled by her diamond ring that the rest seems so unimportant.

I hope Ah Siao will be as nice if not nicer to Mei. I'm happy they work out :)

Saw LP today. She's happy to see me & I like the way she look into my face closely & call me YiYi. So sweet & innocent. I wish she stays like that forever but I know it's not possible.
Momo & KW went for movie that's why LP's with mom.

At least they make effort to spend time w each other. For me, I'm always the one who propose...& he's always the one who turned me down. So sad right? Yeah. I should go & sleep liao. Don't want to waste time thinking of this.

Good night to me,myself & Sally.

Healthy Dinner

2007-06-19T22:39:00.000+08:00

I'd a healthy dinner today. Dried yong tou fu.....
So proud of myself. While working out inthe gym, loads of craving for sinful food.
Luckily didnt give in to temptation.

I finally agreed to go dinner with E71 after so long. I guess it's too cruel to say another 'no'.
I guess a dinner won't kill me.

I scolded Dami over sms today. His attitude was sickening. I hate 1 way conversation.

What a Monday

2007-06-18T14:45:00.000+08:00

What a sleepy Mon.
Look around the office & it's half empty.
Today is MME's last day & the team went lunch w her.
Meimei n I didnt get her any farewell gift.
We're just too disappointed w her.

Now I'm looking forward to this evening - Soup gathering @ VV's place.
Upon my request, Golden Goose prepare my favourite soup - Peanut w Chicken Feet...Yummy.

Dumpling

2007-06-17T20:53:00.000+08:00

aToday is Sunday. It is also Father's day.
aDad isn't working like he normally does.
aI went over to mom's place @ 9.30am to help her with dumpling making.

For the 1st time in 34yrs, I tried making dumpling.
Eating is easier, haha but I enjoyed learning from mom.
She has alot of patience, showing & explaining to me the technic.
I made a total of 16 dumpling the whole afternoon.
Mom was expert! We started @ 11am, she sat through the whole making process till 6.30pm.

In between, I walked around @ home, watch cable, played w my nephew Leroy, took a short nap.
Mom didnt complain tired at all! Except she was having alittle headache & took a Panadol Extra.
Super Mom!!

Happy Father's Day - Dad!
Thank You Mom for the dumpling technic!
This will be one memory I will always remember!

Cafe Del Mar

2007-03-25T14:57:00.000+08:00

Last Fri 23Mar07, PuccA came to pick Meimei & me from office.
We were excited about our outing to Sentosa.
It has been quite awhile since we last catch-up.
It started raining before we reached Cafe Del Mar.
Lucky for us, we got a table w nice view before it started pouring really heavily.

At 1st we were very pleased but when our food were served, our excitement turned into disappointment. The portion was very little for all the dishes we ordered. For S$8+++ there were only 8 pieces of calamari. For S$26+++ we got a fish fillet that's smaller than the size of our palm. We thought we saw the worst, we were wrong until our cheese 'cake' arrived. For S$16+++ what was served was 1/2 scoop of cheesy taste stuff which didn't taste like cake!

The martinis that the girls ordered tasted blend. We will not go back there again.

Plum Evening Dress

2006-12-06T00:43:00.000+08:00

Waited 2hrs this evening till 11pm for my tailor-made evening dress was worth it :)
Although I was a little disappointed when I first saw the unfunished piece.
I am pleasantly surprise I love it when it was completed.
Can I say seamtress is like magician who turned a pc of cloth into something you want?

To many, my dress may look to simple for Glamourous Hollywood theme but I think I can still carry it out pretty nicely. I kept thinking if I have bought the Zara red dress, would I be able to say the same? - No I don't think so :)

Thanks Shirley for rushing the job for me. I know you are probably still rushing someone else's dresses now & I know they will be just as excited when they see how beautiful you have made their dresses :) Good night...........

Basic Japanese

2006-12-05T00:07:00.000+08:00

Yes yes another how quickly time zoomed off topic.
I thought not too long ago I started my break from Jap lesson to prepare for exam. Today new term has started.

I promised myself to put in more effort to do my homework & revision so I won't miss next year's exam :) & pass w flying color.

Before I reached the school, I was half-hearted; very tempted to shop instead of attending class. I went anyway & I'm glad it did :)
I love seeing my classmate; chatting w them. They are a bunch of nice people.

Oh yah, I received my Certificate for Basic Japanese (laminated)!

Memory Bank

2006-12-04T23:56:00.000+08:00

Nowadays I seems to start off my blog commenting how quickly time flies.
It really does, don't you agree?

Over the weekend, PuccA sms me to google 'bakerzinn' and see what I will get.
So I did.......(thinking to myself she must has some trick waiting for) but no.
My blog was the 1st item listed under the search for 'bakerzinn'......
Oh my God oh my God how cool that is! (Ok give me a little chance for online stardom please) haha.

I read the beginning of what I wrote...I can't recollect anything from that 1-2 sentences so I eagerly clicked to read (as if reading someone else's blog, haha). When that particular blog of the day popped up...it was my detailed description of my dinner date w PuccA. If I hadn't blog it, we both would have let it sink to the bottom of our memory bank.

At the moment, I truly appreciate the goodness of 'penning it down' in blog.

Post Holiday Laundry

2006-10-24T16:29:00.000+08:00

So much laundry to do after Holiday :(
Spend nearly half a day washing all the clothes.....

That's the price to pay for Holiday.

Did you have your holiday too during this long break?

Korean Dinner

2006-10-19T22:33:00.000+08:00

Meimei and I had Korean dinner tonight @ Heeren. It's our 1st time. We both enjoy it and had a great time. I have been nagging her to watch My Lovely Samsoon. Hopefully she will do it while I'm away in Krabi, ha.

After dinner we window shopped for awhile - Mainly looking for evening dress for our coming D&D in Dec which the theme is Hollywood Night.

Now I'm exhausted. I will go shower & probably pack alittle for tomorrow's trip :)

Krabi

2006-10-19T22:26:00.000+08:00

2 months ago when I booked our air tickets to Krabi. It has been so long since we last travel on plane together. But why am I not too excited? Maybe because I'm worry the more excited I am the more disappointed I would be if the trip didn't turn out as good as I wish. So is it good or bad?

Anyway, I will let me hair down, relax and enjoy a good break :)

Friends Forever?

2006-10-07T14:23:00.000+08:00

When we were younger, we always thought friends are forever right?
We signed off our schoolmates farewell autograph saying that, didn't we?

Why didn't the adults warn us that not all friends are forever?

Once upon a time, there is this person or persons in your life that you shared everything with including your dreams, fear & even love experiences with, you thought to yourself "Yes, I can trust this person, this is my forever friends"

But time is always the best time of all relationship, isn't it?

And why am I suddenly feeling that not all friends are forever? Because I have seen it & been through it myself. Yes it's sad to know that but I'm ok because I have more important things in life to achieve to focus on than some past faded insincere friendship.

I have tried my best, I have put in effort to maintain the friendship. It has come to an end which I no longer want to waste anymore time on it. If both parties or all parties are sincere & keen to maintain the friendship, wouldnt it be everyone's duty to keep strong & going?

Would I regret in the later part of my life for giving it up? I don't know. Maybe I will maybe I would. For now, I just dont wish to see or to know anything about people who don't worth my waking hours.

Health or Wealth

2006-07-10T11:53:00.000+08:00

If you have to choose between Health or Wealth, what's your choice?

This is a simple enough question but Dami & I argued about it.
It was all because we have different believe & goal in life, there are just things we can't see eye to eye.

Do you know what I chose?

World Cup In Rain

2006-07-10T00:00:00.000+08:00

The 1st & last match I watched this World Cup.
Dami & I went to Robertson Quay @ 11.30pm.
The whole place was already gearing up for the final.

We were surrounded by projectors & plasma. Hence the atmophere was good.
However, it started pouring after half time. We were luckier as our seats were very near the shelter. The minute I felt the rain, we shifted in.

The rain didn't dampened all the supporters' mood. Everyone still continue to cheer for their team.

We left after the 90mins. We knew we had enough time to rush home to watch the penalty shoot. And we did. We watched the final of the game in the comfort of our bed.

Now I can have my Dami back after 'disappearing' almost every night to watch World Cup in pub w friends, thank God.

My Red Heels

2006-07-06T13:24:00.000+08:00

After waiting for about a month, I finally got my ideal Red Heels.
This design was so hot that it went out of stock the very day it's display on the shelf. According to the shop assistance, this's their 3rd batch of production.

Funny thing is I don't see anyone wearing on the street....

Anyway, my Red Heels so eye-catching. Almost everyone (ladies only) inthe office who saw it would pass nice comments, so thrilled.

2006-06-19T14:13:00.000+08:00

On an unusual Sat afternoon after attending my Japanese Class, I had craving for good steak!
Being sick for one whole week I was finally feeling better & have the appetite to eat some solid food.

Since I planned to drop-by Tanglin Mall to pay a visit to Pucca's flea market stall, I took a stroll along Hilton & Forum while searching for a nice place where they serve good steak. Nothing come to mind except for Black Angus.

But since I'm eating alone, I didn't want to spend too much. Then I found Jerry's BBQ & Grill. The restaurant look new & the price seems ok. I was the 1st customer for the evening. Ordered a strawberry yoghurt drink & a New Zealand steak.

Armed with a new story book by Haruki Murakami, I had a lovely evening.

Flu

2006-06-12T14:20:00.000+08:00

I always thought good health is very important.
So I take good care of myself. Less sugar, less salt. No MSG if I'm cooking.
Take my vitamins daily but still when Flu bug strike I still got it!

I don't understand! Frustrated with being 'handicapped' in bed for the past 2 days (over weekend) I decided today I'll 'recovered'. I went to see doc to get extra medicine & also MC so I can rest another day @ to be fully recovered. Then I went for hotcake breakfast @ Mac.

Everything seems well. I came home, do some laundry & bit by bit I feel exhausted. I feel weak. I feel I need to lie down. But I don't want to. I continued vacuuming my room & suddenly I see stars! That's when I 'surrendered'. Damn! I thought it's mind over body?!

Well....I guess I better not be so stubborn; take my med & go rest.

Jumbo Seafood

2006-05-10T11:48:00.000+08:00

I skipped class on Mon because Dami agreed to bring for seafood J
I have craving for seafood the whole of Sun & was pestering him to eat with me.

He was too exhausted after returning home from BKK on Sun afternoon I didn’t want to be too demanding so I waited till Mon to bark him again. Surprisingly he’s ok.

So we went Jumbo @ Clarke Quay. We got a table by the river. The crab was great but Dami said he preferred Palm Beach more.

Overall we had a great evening except for the part that he mentioned he’s thinking of venturing into another business. I wasn’t too agreeable as he’s only started partnership in the current company for barely 6 months. I feel that he haven’t even put in enough to turn his focus to elsewhere. But he doesn’t think so.

The Language of Love

2006-05-07T14:00:00.000+08:00

Have you ever find it challenging expressing yourself or feel upset when you love ones, friends or even colleagues don't get the picture of what you want them to understand?

I do. Sometime I almost feel like giving up after trying to get Dami understand my point. It seems to me that no matter how much I tried to express my feelings, he doesnt seems to be able to get my point.

We had great time talking to each other about everyday happening about his work as well as mine & also our friends. But when it comes to serious conversation such as how I feel about his certain behaviours, he just seems "shut-off" or misinterpret.

I "complained" to Momo once after a tearful conversation that I can't "communicate" w my hubby, she lend me this book. She took up 1 year of basic counselling course thru her church, I thought she probably know how to tackle the situation.

I'm half way thru the book. It's really quite interesting. I've also tried alittle on the technic suggested. Seems to work quite well. I hope when I finish the book, I can summarise & share it with Dami (he's not the sort who read book beside car magazines, haha). Hopefully that will help him better understand the importance of in-depth communication.

Bishan Coffee Shop 1133

2006-05-07T11:53:00.000+08:00

Today is another day worth celebrating.
It is the opening of Hobbes' parents' coffeeshop @ Bishan.
As per Momo's suggestion, we reached the Bishan @ 9.30am.
The coffeeshop is already quite filled-up.

There are only 2 food stalls inthe coffeeshop.
1 of them is the famous Minced Pork Stall from MacPherson.
Though I had never tried the one in MacPherson, I thought it really tasted quite good.

Apparently the main owner of Minced Pork Stall is Hobbes' mom schoolmate. Hearsay, he's now cooking @ their coffeeshop & his assistant is maning the stall @ MacPherson :)

The other stall is a Nasi Lemak Stall. They are also one of the popular stall in Bishan area; hence they attracted alot of their 'die-hard' fans to support. Their chicken wings are yummy.

By the time we left @ 10.30am, there are long queues in front of both the stalls. There're people waiting around for table.

It is a great start. I told Hobbes, if business is this good everyday, he can quit his job & help his parents to count $$.

Of course our ever popular Little Princess had her own share of attention too. Even relatives/friends who came to support the coffeeshop has the same comment: "Aiyo, look like her father (Hobbes)"

We had a great morning. I think as I'm blogging away now, Momo & Hobbes & Little Princess are still inthe coffeeshop, entertaining the relatives & friends.

DA WEI YI EATING HOUSE

BISHAN ST.11

BLK 150 #01-133

Papa's Liver

2006-05-03T22:08:00.000+08:00

Today is a day worth celebrating.
We got confirmation for our family doctor that Papa's Hep B condition is cancer-free.

From the blood test result it showed that Papa have the anti-body to defend his Liver. Ultra Scan also gave him a pass! Yeh! Yeh!

I know Papa is relieved. So am I. I know it's God's blessing. I know our prayers heard. Through this incident I have learn to be more patient with my family and am trying to apply to friends :)

Thank God for blessing us!

Pucca's Last Day

2006-05-02T22:44:00.000+08:00

Today is Pucca's last day.
I would be lying if I say I don't feel sad.
I just refused to give myself a chance to dwell on my sadness.

Still remember the 1st day she joined the company, she looked like a lost little girl in kindergarden. Not too long later she showed us her confident side.
She was such an energetic girl filled with the eagerness to learn & willingness to explore new ground.

Unfortunately the culture of our organisation wore her off over the last 3 years.
Everyday she has to put up with irresponsible behavior of some managers/colleagues.

Later things got worsed when she was betrayed by someone who was supposed to be closed to her. It was the darkest period during her employment with our company.

Then it was as if God's trying to tell her "Girl, there's other things in life that's worth living for". She survived Tsunami. Yes she scared the hell out of me, out of her whole family but God let her come back to us.

Before leaving for Phuket that Dec after Xmas, she was determined to start 2004 right, to have a better year ahead. After her returned from Tsunami, she was more determined to let go of the past & live a more meaningful life.

Though there were times the past catches up with her, she would feel down she would questioned me over & over again why some people can just behaved the way they behaved & walkaway without feeling a single bit of guilt. I might not be able to comfort her every time or give her the answer she wants to hear, I made her drink with me, hee hee.

Until 1 day she declared that I'm her ad-hoc drinking buddy :)

There used to be 3 of us who were closed. Pucca, me & MV.
Among us Pucca & MV were closer & MV & I were closer.
I think among us, I'm the blur queen. I didnt even know when unhappy stuff happened between them until one day I can't Pucca's sad face anymore, I asked her what happened.

Only then she opened up to me. And only then we put our pieces together.
Only then we both realised we have been fooled by MV. Or should I say I was a bigger fool since I didn't even spot it. Yes MV betrayed her. Betrayed me. Betrayed our trust, our friendship.

But it's ok. God has a plan for everyone of us, right? Yes!
If not because of the betrayal incident, I won't became closer to Pucca. Then I won't know her understand her as much as I do now. I found a friend in Pucca.

Pucca is more sincere more down to earth maybe sometime abit lost of what she wants in life but she sure know what she doesnt want. She's caring & encouraging & fun to be with. She's also generous & kind @ heart. Opps does that make her sounds like an angel, she sure is.

I always believe:

Friends are angels sent by God.
Some angels quietly accompanied you when you are down.
Some angels celebration your success & joy.
Some angels left after a short period of time.
Some angels stayed for a long long time.

Pucca dear, you are an angel that I hope you'll stay for a long long time cos I'll.

IUI

2006-05-01T20:08:00.000+08:00

We decided to go IUI. We did it on 29 Apr 06.
We don't want to waste any more time & money.

IUI is a process whereby doctor pick out the good & healthy semen & inject into womb.
The success rate is about 26%.
It was a painless procedure. After the insertion, I was put on a special bed which my head is toward the bottom & my legs up for 20mins.

For the next 2 weeks all we can do is to wait for good news & pray hard :)

1st May 2006

2006-05-01T10:48:00.000+08:00

It's amazing how time flies.
The last time I blogged was exactly a month ago.
I've been so busy that I hardly even have time to rest.

Don't know what happened to me. I have been feeling tired lately.
No matter how much I rest; I'm still exhausted.

I exercise regularly, I eat healthily, I'm not very stressful so why am I always sleepy or tired?

The last 2 days was solely resting @ home w Dami.
Watched 2 DVDs - Cave In & Hills have eyes.
Both movies are so-so only.

I also tried to catch-up on my Japanese. Bought a new dictionary on Fri.

I planned to catch a movie today. Wonder if Dami is keen to travel down town....
Momo & Princess Cheryl should be having fun in KL now.
Momo said Princess Cheryl was very excited when they reached Genting Highland last night :)

You Are Heineken...hee

2006-04-02T12:50:00.000+08:00

You Are Heineken

You appreciate a good beer, but you're not a snob about it.
You like your beer mild and easy to drink, so you can concentrate on being drunk.
Overall, you're a friendly drunk who's likely to buy a whole round for your friends... many times.
Sometimes you can be a bit boring when you drink. You may be prone to go on about topics no one cares about.

What's Your Beer Personality?

People Envy Your Compassion

2006-04-02T12:46:00.000+08:00

People Envy Your Compassion

You have a kind heart and an unusual empathy for all living creatures. You tend to absorb others' happiness and pain.
People envy your compassion, and more importantly, the connections it helps you build. And compassionate as you are, you feel for them.

What Do People Envy About You?

Breaking Point

2006-03-18T10:16:00.000+08:00

They said it has reached the breaking point in our dept that there are so many resignation at 1 go.

I'm almost @ the breaking point in 1 area of my life. I've been very kind & understanding for a long long time. Nothing has been changed. I'm tired of going round & round the same problems same issues over & over again.

And what's worse? I'm the only partly in the situation working hard; taking initiative to try to make things work. I didnt succeed. Each time it just causes more doubts as to why I'm still holding on to it; pinning hope that 1 day things will be different.

But when will that 1 day comes? How long do I have to wait? It has reached my tolerable limit that I started to behave badly; I started being emotional. I feel like just letting everything go. Just Go! Don't think so much. Stop considering is it worth it. I'm tired! Just Tired.

Tried & Tired is just a different placing of 'r' & "i". Maybe it's because you tried & tried so much that you even get tired of trying, you give up.

Resignation

2006-03-17T15:00:00.000+08:00

There's has been quite a no. of resignation inthe dept recently.
It started w the guy who our boss always target @. No matter what he does, he can never escape being criticized & scrutinized. Partly it's his fault that he never once fight for himself whenever he was "attacked" by our boss.

I guess to some people their mentality is that don't argue with the boss you will be safe. Just do what the boss says you will be fine. That's so not true. It's because of his constant silence whenever our boss make unreasonable demand that allowed our boss to push him over & over again.

Even after he tendered, he still doesn't speak up for himself. He still speak so softly that our boss has to say "hah...what? what are you talking about? I can't hear you!!!"

Anyway, after his resignation, there were 4 others. Somehow it never occur to our boss that he could be the root of the problems. It's a pity to see real good & capable colleagues go.

80s

2006-03-05T15:17:00.000+08:00

This weekend on Class 95 Fm is all 80s weekend.
I love 80s more than any era.
Guess it's because it's the most carefree days of my life.
Exploring new things in life, moved to new home, got my 1st boyfriend, had my 1st broken heart, 1st job....it all happened inthe 80s.

While I listened to those familiar songs they brought back those feelings I used to have. While it brings back fond memories, I'm sad @ the same time. Where have all the good time gone?

Why cant I continue to live my life as carefree as I used to be?
Why cant I make decision w/o fear like I used to be?
Why why why......

Hong Kong 2006

2006-02-22T15:56:00.000+08:00

I'm now secretly counting down for my trip to HOng KOng tomorrow.
Imagining what I would be doing tomorrow @ this time in cool weather with BearBear & Apple.

How nice if I can leave @ 5.30pm sharp this evening but I can't, still have to attend a department meeting. Let's pray that the meeting won't end too late.

Nihongo

2006-02-07T09:02:00.000+08:00

After last night's lesson, I felt I better start doing my revision.
It's getting tougher week by week!

Now we have started doing homework in Hiragana.
Man it's tough! To make matter worse, PuccA is going to attend Tue's class from now on due to her Pre-school Teaching Diploma that she has enrolled herself.

Anyway, there'll be a Nihon-jin visitor today, I thought of practising my very limited Nihongo with him but worry I might make a fool of myself! How? Should I try?

My Papa; My Hero

2006-01-18T14:37:00.000+08:00

My Papa is my hero since I was very young.
I wasn't very close to Papa until I was much older.
He works 7 days a week to bring home the bacon.
Because work took up alot of his time, we don't talk heart to heart. And also Papa being a traditional chinese man is quite reserve when come to expressing his love for us.

I remember on my 1st day to primary school, he brought me there.
He bought me a bowl noodle soup.On some very rare Sundays when he took off, he will take us to Marine Parade and we will spent the whole day @ the beach. Sometime over the weekend when he knocked off early, he would drive us to the neighbourhood park.

Papa expresses his love for us by working hard.
To me he's the best Papa. With one income, he provides us (my mom + 4 of us children) with a comfortable home, warm food & a car to bring us around.

Last Fri (13/1/06) our family doctor told us that Papa is a Hep B carrier. I could feel that Papa suddenly feels very small. It seems to me that he feel he has 'lost' his power to provide & protect his family. I could sense that he feel helpless & worry. He suddenly seems so fragile to me.

I tried not to let it affect me like it affected Momo. I'm trying to be very positive. Like what the doctor said, he's just a carrier. As long as he does his blood test yearly to monitor the condition, life should be pretty much normal.

Now as I'm putting down my thoughts on blog, I teared. I couldnt help it. Thinking back of the past of all the good memories w Papa, I'm scare of losing him.....

My NEW new year resolution: More time with my love ones!

New Year New Me

2006-01-11T10:46:00.000+08:00

Zip Zap 1 month has quickly since I last blog.
Have I given up blogging?
No! I was simply too too busy!

Into the New Year, I have decided to have a major change in life in attitude.
I want a simpler life.
By that I mean get rid of things that are still useful yet I havent use it in the past 2-3 years.
In the past I used to hold on the stuff unwilling to let go fearing that I might need it someday.
Clothing that were too tight for me to fit in anymore, keeping it was for the hope one day, yeah maybe one day I would be back to the weight & size I used to be (haha dreaming).

So since after Christmas, Dami & I have been diligently giving away stuff. Throwing away those which cannot be recycle anymore. Or selling to Karung Kuni.

Spent the 2 holidays of this month clearing out all the rubbish.
Going to spend another 2 more weekends painting the house.

I'm looking forward to a brighter/cleaner house :)

I have learn: Less is More
This is my goal for the year!

Bye Uncle

2005-12-10T21:58:00.000+08:00

Momo called me @ 11.30am.
Told me the sad news.
4th uncle passed away.
Although we are not that close, I still felt sad.

I believe Bearbear & Apple must be glad that they managed to see & talk him yesterday.
If Bearbear chose to visit him only over the weekend, he would have missed talking to his brother for the last time.

Bearbear is already @ the wake. Apple isnt well so she won't be going.
Furthermore, Apple needs to take care of Kodomo Momo.

Hairdo

2005-12-10T21:52:00.000+08:00

For the 1st time after knowing Vonvon for more than 10 years, we did our hair together! We go to the same salon, same stylist but never arrange to do our hair @ the same time.

Luckily I have her w me today. The salon was crowded as usual during this season, I spent 5.5 hrs inthe salon instead of the usual 4.
We then went Food Republic for dinner which was unplanned for.

The only setback? My hair didnt turn out the way we (me & my stylist) wanted.
Quite dry @ both the side of my hair. Need to redo that part again on Tue.
That's another 4hrs!!!

Happy Birthday Boss?

2005-12-10T21:47:00.000+08:00

Today is my boss' birthday.
So I sent him a birthday greeting via SMS.
No respond from him.
Is it rude not to have any respond w someone giving u their wishes?
Be it birthday, well wishes or Christmas greetings, right?
Or am I wrong?

Early

2005-12-10T06:08:00.000+08:00

Jump out of bed @ 5.30am.
Dami's supposed to leave home to SIR building to catch a coach to KL for business trip.
Guess we were both too tired. We snoozed a few times still managed to fall back to sleep.

Not sure should I go back to sleep as I'm quite awake already.
But then I know I'm like a half charged battery, in less than 2hrs I will feel tired & sleep again.
I think I better go back to sleep. Have to do rebond later @ 11am.

Is Pucca sleeping soundly now in Bintan?
Wonder what they did last night. Did they make her drink alot?
If yes, she'll probably do the Chicken Little dance for them.

I gave Meimei a treat to a session of eyebrow trimming as her Christmas present.
We both went Hollywood Secrets last evening to get it done.
We both love it. I'm glad she love it especially when my beautician is not in very good mood. She wasnt as friendly as her usual self.

Meimei left to met Ah Xiao for dinner & movie. I went to have Pepper Lunch for dinner then went Borders before heading home to watch DVD w Dami. My Friday evening ended well :)

My Sat started ok too. Today is definitely going to be a beautiful because it's going to be Good Hair Day, yay!

Sofitel Palm Resort JB

2005-12-07T19:55:00.000+08:00

This is the venue for our annual D&D.
I must say it was a very successful one.
That's part of the reason I was too busy to blog.
Being part of the organizing committee, there's a lot of nitty gitty to worry especially when the event is drawing near.
A famous sleeping beauty like me was actually suffering from insonmia 2 nights before the event.
Worry that my fellow of colleagues wouldnt enjoy, worry that the food is not right, worry this, worry that & finally just as I thought I had the assurance of everything is going to be fine, I realised I got NOTHING to wear for the event!
It's a poolside event. Luckily managed to grab a nice top from Heeren & a Carpri pants from This Fashion. Hey This Fashion has huge improvement in bringing in nice trendy stuff these days. Of course the price is higher than before too.

Sharing room with Pucca & Meimei, we had a great time especially after Pucca got high & started do Chicken Little dance for us after the D&D, haha.

Dame

2005-12-06T23:57:00.000+08:00

I'm speechless for the longest time.
I couldn't put my thoughts in words.
There're millions of stuff in my mind now & I hate to be awake when I'm sleepy.
Very contradicting isn't it?

ahhh.... that's it for tonight! Not going to try putting into words.
ahhh.... I simply hate it!

D*A*M*E

I'm Back

2005-12-04T18:51:00.000+08:00

I'm back! Back to the kind of lifestyle I like & familiar with.
It has been almost 1 month since I blog!
There are so much to blog I don't even know where to start.

I will try my best to recall what has happened during this 1 month.

Where to begin...

Back to classroom
Finally I signed up for Japanese Language course after thinking about it for so many years.
Partly because I found someone who has the common interest w me & that's Pucca.
The 1st lesson started last Mon 28/11/05.
The school is located @ Shaw House, so it's very convenient for us.
7-9pm on every Mon. Our teacher is Watanabe Sinseh :) A young female teacher.
Before the lesson start, Pucca & I were secretly hope that our teacher would be a cute & handsome Nihon-jin.

Unusual Sat

2005-11-06T14:50:00.000+08:00

On normal Sat, I would be rotting @ home.
Hide away from crowds over the weekend; recharge @ home.
Yesterday I did something different though.
Went out w Meimei.
Supposed to go blading w Meimei & Pucca.
But poor Pucca was under the weather.
So Meimei & I decided to go shopping & movie instead.
We ate @ Long John Silver before the show - Flightplan.
Always like Jodie Foster.

After movie, I suggested we go Ichiban Boshi @ Esplanade for dinner.
Since Meimei Japanese name is Chawamushi, U can imagine her eyes widen when I said let go Ichiban Boshi for chawamushi.

As usual, she'd 2 serving of it :)
And as usual, I'd a small bottle of hot sake.
After a satisfying dinner, we went to The V Tea Room for of couse Tea.
We also tried their famous Bailey's cake.
Hmm...so relaxing.
The deco of the cafe is very English.
Red wall, gold frame mirror, antique design chair with nice china tea set.

I know Pucca & Momo would like this cafe very much too.
Will bring them there soon :)

BakerzInn

2005-11-04T22:30:00.000+08:00

Sneaked out of office @ 5.10pm.
PuccA suddenly have craving for strawberry short cake from BakerzInn. So we went Paragon.
My 1st time dining there. Usually only go there for coffee.
In the end (as usual) we'd more than we plan for.
We shared a Linguni Vongore & curry chicken.
Coupe Cheesecake for dessert & latte/ice tea as drinks.
We chatted almost about everything from BKK trip to maomao's character & his bad attitude to spooky real life encounter.

We departed near Tangs where Pucca went to shop I head towards Borders. Led a woman with her daughter & mom to Borders too :)
Then while crossing the road after browsing some mag, met cookie. Surprise surprise, she's going to meet Pucca, haha.

Famous Blogger

2005-11-04T22:23:00.000+08:00

Just read the blog of one of the most famous blogger in S'pore (hint: handicap toilet saga)
Gosh, not the kind of blog I find it enriching.
Thank God there are so many other nice bloggers around which I can learn from.

Of course there's freedom of speech here in blog (except passing unfair remark that hurt the harmony of our country) but find it quite turn-off.

Digi Cam Part 2

2005-11-04T17:05:00.000+08:00

Laoshu: I'm alittle angry w u (over the phone)
Dami: Y?
Laoshu: Last night about digi cam. Think u abit selfish
Dami: I dun understand y must u get 1, u can borrow from yr sibilings or friends
Laoshu: Borrow everytime I 1 2 use it is v troublesome
Dami: What u 1 2 take? What so nice to take? I really dun understand
Laoshu: Everyday's stuff lor
Dami: Dun b 'bo liao' lah
Laoshu: Everytime u 1 2 buy something, did I ever stop u?
Dami: What I bought u can use too what!! We dun need 2 digi cam @ hm!!

-- The End--

I'm still unhappy....
I'm still angry....
I earn my money, I take care of the family n I cant buy a stupid camera as I wish!!
What is this?!

Digi Cam

2005-11-04T16:20:00.000+08:00

Thought of getting myself a digital camera.
When I was much younger I took alot of pix using conventional camera.
I used to be the one with camera for all the gathering.
But I gradually stopped as the no. of pix grow & also the cost for developing those photos.

Happened to be at Harvey Norman last night after dinner @ Marche.
Went in to take a look at the 2 brand I was eyeing on.
Couldnt decide which is better, I summoned Dami over to help & give advise.

He reluctantly came over (partly due to his stiff neck; he wasnt in his best mood, partly he was checking out on the plasma tv which he has been eyeing for the longest time).

Laoshu: what do u think of this? (holding on to Canon i zoom)
Dami: why u 1 2 buy this? I already got a Canon, why dun u consider another brand?
Laoshu: what about this then? (pointing to Panasonic Lumix 5 mega)
Dami: u 1 2 buy now meh?
Laoshu: not now lah, maybe sometime during xmas as a gift for myself
Dami: u buy digi cam for what? u only use for gatherings or occasion; unlike me, I bought it bcos I need it for working, once in a while u need it I can lead it to u what.
Laoshu: ......................

I was pissed. I think Dami is being selfish.
I seldom stop him from getting whatever he wanted; unless it's really way out.
But on the other hand, he always make me feel like I'm spending unnecessary.
I don't have to ask for his permission on my spending, but I rather have his blessing.
I'm sick of sharing w him what I aim to get w/o him giving me a dress-down!

Harvest Thoughts

2005-11-04T12:37:00.000+08:00

i believe our actions reflect our thoughts
i also believe we can harvest our thoughts
when u harvest merry thoughts, kind thoughts
you sow the seeds of love & happiness or even peace

someone said:

Heartbreaks last as long as you want

Cut as deep as you allow them to go

this is also thought process right?

BKK

2005-11-01T12:26:00.000+08:00

Finally went BKK on 28.10.2005 (Fri)
Unfortunately I wasnt as excited as I was in HK.
Guess mainly due to the culture difference & the weather.

When I went to HK in Feb this year, the weather was chilly.
I guess I'm the sort who love to travel during cooler weather.
Singapore is already so hot throughout the year, need to visit cold country.

Most of the stuff in BKK belong to the casual type.
Only the shoe & bags are really cheap.
The rest of the stuff are more or less the same price here.

The only thing I enjoyed most was visiting Moon Bar - 62th on Banyan Tree, Open air - Wow!
The night scene was spectacular but I felt wobbly.
Maybe because of the pressure of the height in open air!
Goodness. On one hand I wanted very much to stand next to the railing to absorb the view, on the other I'm so afraid I might just fallen out. Dilemma is the word at that time. Looking @ the rest of the guests around me; they seems to be more relaxed than I do. What a shame!

Blog Friend

2005-11-01T12:16:00.000+08:00

11 day more to my blog friend Ms Little Snooze wedding.
Cant recall what I was doing on the 11th day before wedding.
Probably having mixed feelings.
1 hand looking forward to start new life w the man of my life.
The other cant bear to leave my parents whom I have lived w for 26 years.
And also the laughter in our house.

6 years today, I'm happy.
I'm sure my blog friend would be the same if not happier :)

Dream

2005-11-01T12:12:00.000+08:00

I have been having weird dreams lately.
I don't why.
It's not a nightmare; it's not a sweet dream either.
It's a dream that reflecting my innermost thoughts.
Why are they coming into my dream?
Isn't it suppose to be hidden somewhere in my memory bank?
I don't like to have dream like this.
It make me wonder am I missing something in life?
It make me feel out of control.

I Like....

2005-10-21T15:50:00.000+08:00

I like the colour Blue
I like to keep $5 note
I like taking photo
I like to be taken just as well
I like chilled cold beer
I like to wear plain colour instead of print
I like to take 1/2 day or 1 day leave on Friday
I like dog more than cat
I like to read foreign magazine - SELF, SHAPE
I like thriller/horror/suspense movie or storybook
I like to paint my home white
I like simple furniture
I like to chill out with friends @ Ice Cold Beer
I like Fried Chicken Wing (the only fried stuff I take)
I like Sat more than Sun
I like Dec & Jan
I like going to the airport even just to have breakfast @ Swensen
I like to drive @ night
I like to sleep immediately after shower
I like guys with nice muscular arms
I like guys with bad boy look
I like Robbie William
I like Meg Ryan
I like to watch CSI
I like to watch Law & Order
I like to watch Sex in the City
I like to watch Desperate Housewives
I like to watch Ally McBeal
I like to watch Lost
I like to watch Gilmore Girls
I like to watch Dark Angel
I like to read book written by Mary Higgins Clark
I like to read book written by Sophie Kinsella
I like London
I like Hong Kong
I like to carry weight
I like the language of Japanese more than French
I like naan
I like prata
I like sardine with bread
I like rainy day
I like having dinner with my family
I like watching movie with Dami in our bedroom on our bed
I like my current job compare to the previous one
I like who I am today more than who I was 3 years ago
I like BLV by Bvlgari
I like Glamourous by Polo Ralph
I like people who smell nice
I like straight hair than curly hair
I like English songs more than Mandarin songs
I like to look for information from www.about.com
I like to look for workout detail from www.shape.com
I like texts more than figures
I like cold shower not hot shower
I like more milk in my coffee
I like to eat bread with curry
I like chilli crab than pepper crab
I like crab from Still Road than No Sign Board
I like red wine from Australia
I like ...
I like ...
I like ...

Wallet

2005-10-21T15:24:00.000+08:00

Never spend more than $100 for a wallet for myself
Decided to invest on a good one that will last
Spotted 2 designs I desire

LV Epi leather 6 credit card wallet
I like the Red one
But they stopped manufacturing :(

Then found Ferragamo 9 credit card wallet complete w coin compartment in Black but they out of stock!

Arrggghhhhh....

Happy? Birthday

2005-10-21T14:53:00.000+08:00

Dami's birthday is tomorrow.
Dami said he rather I give him cash than to spend it on expensive dinner.
Dami is always this realistic.

I have planned a list of programmes way beforehand:
- Breakfast @ Halia complete with free flow of Champagne
- A 2-hr Spa + Massage
- Movie
- Dinner @ Patara
- Drink @ New Asia Bar

Haiz....now I have to amend the plan after hearing what he said.

Celebration over the years:
2002 - Lawry's The Prime Rib
2003 - Al Dente
2004 - Tao

Last night he said he rather I spent on things or food that he likes than those that's famous or expensive.

He also said though his friends envious him when they heard I treated him to Lawry's for his birthday but to him, he thinks no big deal just like any another rib.

Now I'm lost. I really don't know how to celebrate his birthday for him!

Sore Throat

2005-10-21T14:35:00.000+08:00

Out of the blue I got sore throat.
Maybe it was the curry noodle I had yesterday for lunch.
Maybe it was the McWing I had during tea-break yesterday.

Now I'm having headache & sleepy.
All I need now is a bed.
3 hours more to go before I can leave office.....xian

Travel Alone?

2005-10-15T10:49:00.000+08:00

This picture was taken almost a year ago on 12Nov04
This picture was taken inthe pub in Shangri-La KL
The waitress saw me dining & drinking alone,
she thought I'm traveling on my own.
Well I wish I could do it someday, travel alone.
The waitress took this picture for me.

Last year went KL w Dami.
This year I have yet to go holiday with him.
Must plan something soon.

Shangri-La KL

2005-10-15T10:33:00.000+08:00

This is the lounge @ Shangri-la KL

Notice the green?

It's almost similar with what we have here

P.A.

2005-10-15T10:24:00.000+08:00

Opening for a PERSONAL Assistant to GM of Public Listed Co.
Must posses:
- deg fr recognised U
- independent/pro-active/able to think ahead is most preferred
- meticulous/efficient worker/outgoing personality/good communication skills
- willing to travel

Hmm...look like all bosses are looking for the something (high-lighted in Blue)
I really have to put in more effort in these areas.

Trouble with Love is

2005-10-12T17:37:00.000+08:00

Love can be a many splendid thing
Has another joy you bring
A dozen roses Diamond rings
Dreams for sale
And fairy tales

It’ll make you hear a symphony
And you’ll just want the world to see
But like a drunk that makes you blind
It’ll fool you every time

** The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
Gets stronger then your pride

The trouble with love is
It doesn’t care how fast you fall
And you can’t refuse the call
See you’ve got no say at all

Now I was just a once a fool it’s true
I played the game by all the rules
But now my world’s a deeper blue
I’m sadder but I’m wiser too
Swore I’d never love again
I swore my heart would never mend
Said love wasn’t worth the pain
But then I hear it call my name

Repeat **

Every time I turn around
I think I’ve got it all
My heart keeps callin
And I keep on fallin
Over and over again
This set story always ends the same
Me standin in the pouring rain
It seems no matter what I do
It tears my heart in two

Time

2005-10-12T10:23:00.000+08:00

Time is too slow for those who wait

Too swift for those who fear

Too long for those who grieve

Too short for those who rejoice

But for those who love

Time is not

Created with Love for

Arron, Fabbo, Daddy

1961-2001

Nov 2004

2005-10-11T10:58:00.000+08:00

Going through an old note pad, I saw what I wrote about a year ago.

12/11/2004 (Fri) - 7pm

Location: The Pub @ Shangri-la K.L.

"I enjoy this moment of spending time alone here.

I just had a nice soak in the tub earlier.

Now am enjoying dinner & drink"

12/11/2004 (Fri) - 8.45pm

Location: Lobby Lounge @ Shangri-la K.L.

"Missing someone is like missing a scent that is so familiar yet you can only try to recall how it really smell like and not really getting it."

24/11/2004 (Wed) - Time unknown

"1 month before Christmas. The mood's getting merrier.

I'm having my breakfast @ Spinelli, listening to Christmas songs. I wish I could be sitting in a Cafe onthe street."

I have a habit of writing down my emotion of the moment.

Looking back @ what I wrote, I've certainly grown to be a much better person today!

Living Example

2005-10-10T23:00:00.000+08:00

$ Still on the subject about Money
$ Aunt A is in her mid-40s
$ Constantly ill, constantly blamed on her 'bad' luck
$ Always wait for someone to bail her out of difficulties
$ It can be as simple as soup from friends/a paid trip to Malaysia
$ To paying her credit cards debts for her when she received lawyers letters
$ She holds 2 part-time jobs. 1 as a clerk by day & the other clinic assistant by night
$ Still $$$ is never enough
$ Borrowed from one to pay another
$ Her 3 children are angry with her, they disrepect her because of her incapacity to handle $$$ when she had them
$ Her husband stopped talking to her as long as 3 years ago
$ Power/Water supply was cut a couple of time because she default payment
$ Now I'm not saying Aunt A is a bad person. She's just bad in managing her $$$ when she had it. She spent generously on colleagues, she's 'not calculative'.
$ But then again, is it her attitude of being 'not calculative' landed her in today's position?
$ Because she has no $$$ to treat her illness, her condition became worse
$ Because she has no $$$ to pay bill, her husband thought she's irresponsible
$ Because she has no $$$ to pay for her children education, they think she's incapable as a mom

$ Mis-managed of funds could have such chain reaction.
$ Aunt A is my living example.
$ I am NOT going to grow old poor & unhappy, blaming on 'bad' luck when things fall apart.

? You might think what about her husband, why can't he help with the family expenses?
? The fact is that she max out all those credit cards he sub for her
? The fact is that he has to pay for what she charged
? The fact is that she crashed his car & he still need to finance the loan
? The fact is that she used up all the $$$ in their joint account w/o him knowing
? The fact is that he got retrenched w/o compensation

! How much can a person take?
! He can only suffer in silence
! His only way of showing his anger was stopped talking to her

: Why did I suddenly talk about Aunt A?
: Well, each time I walked pass old folks trying to sell tissue paper on the street or @ the underpass, I would think to myself, "What did they not do when they were young & have to do this for a living?"
: The image of Aunt A doing that will always pop in my mind.

Club Rainbow

2005-10-10T22:31:00.000+08:00

$1 per day is my way of helping the needy.
I became a donor this evening while walking towards Taka after work.
I just have to cut down 2 expensive per month.
It isn't too much to spare :)
It's my little way to thank God for His kindness.

Mini Mouse

2005-10-10T00:49:00.000+08:00

In 3 days time, Kawai will be a month old! (Oh dear, how fast time flies!)
Being grand-parents for the 1st time, Bearbear & Apple eagerly went to Poh Heng to pick a gold bracelet for her.

KHH,Didi & me, we bought her a Mini Mouse pandent w chain & it even come with a Mini Mouse soft toy, so cute.

Miss You

2005-10-07T23:45:00.000+08:00

Do you know I do? Do you?
Do you know I wish you never said you will be there for me when I need you?

It's Fri today, are you hanging out w your friends like you always do?
Are you seeing someone now?
Why can't we continue to be friend?

Why?
Why do I still hold-on to an expired friendship?
I don't know. I really don't. I wish someone could tell me how.

Two Nights In A Row

2005-10-07T10:42:00.000+08:00

Yes, two nights in a row I went dinner w PuccA n Meimei.
Both are ad hoc.

On Wed (5/10) - Meimei was supposed to go for yoga class w her mommy. But just before she leaves the office, she received a nasty call from an agent screaming @ the top of his lungs @ her. Poor Meimei. By the time she finished the 'spoilt-mood' call, she's already late for her class.

Not wanting to spend the evening feeling angry, she asked me out for coffee.
On the way out of office, we met out colleague, GHamster who was on her way to meet her bfren for dinner @ Sakae, saying that there's some kind of promotion.

And Meimei's eyes got brighten up the minute she heard Sakae! Being a chawamushi queen, I think the best way to end her bad evening is to have plenty serving of it :)

So we went! PuccA who got stucked in the so-called 'shitty' meeting joined us later. The whole dinner was really good. We ate, we laughed, we grumbled, we eagerly talked about our forthcoming BKK trip....time just quietly flied by.

We left after we were too full to eat anything. I thought we are heading home but the 2 girls are just energetic to go home so they suggested coffee. So we went NYDC @ Heeren.

I told them I have the tendency of saying 'DKNY' whenever I want to say NYDC.
Meimei said there was a time she referred to it as YMCA, haha so funnie.

Last night we were having some kind of training on Pleasure Craft. During break-time, someone offered us 'Roasted Chicken' flavour potato chips. It tasted exactly like bbq chicken, yummy. After eating that, she's not willing to settle for just the taste of it and not getting the real stuff. So she suggested we go Newton Circus to satisfy her craving.

We screamed when we realised Newton Circus was in pitch dark.
Why?! That was what we exclaimed?

We ended up @ Alexandra Food Centre (behind AIA tower).
We had Sting Ray, BBQ chicken wing & stir-fried veg. Yummy, yummy.
In total we spend $6/- each only!

Life

2005-10-07T10:03:00.000+08:00

"When death is close, you embrace life more"

- Geraldine Brooks -

Author of "The Power of Hair"

She temporarily lost her thick locks after undergoing chemotherapy for cancer

Bye Angel

2005-10-05T10:57:00.000+08:00

20/10/2005 (Tue) - Cyn's little angel left her.
After a brief 18 days on earth, her little love one went back to heaven.

Momo cried when she told me the news.
I got teary but cant really cry as I was inthe office.

I can only pray that Cyn will get over soon.

It's Christmas

2005-10-04T13:34:00.000+08:00

I was so thrilled to see Christmas items on display @ Daiso.
I'd a hard time deciding which to buy as they are look so nice & only @ $2/-.
After much struggle, I bought 2 packets of Christmas Decorations.
1 packet contain 3 mini deco which I gave 1 to PuccA, 1 to Meimei & 1 for me.
I hang it on our pc (except for PuccA, hers is a laptop so I can only hang near her phone)

The other packet is a slightly bigger decoration which I hang on my partition.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Dump That Bag

2005-10-03T10:26:00.000+08:00

What bag?
Emotional bag!

Emotional baggage is a term used to describe unresolved issues we bring from the past into our current relationships -@ work, w friends or in love lives.

Unless deal w it, it can weigh us down & keep us from pursuing robust connections w other people.

Unless negative emotions like insecurity & mistrust are dealth w, they will just keep coming out

Dare to ask hard questions:
- Is this what I deserve in life

If you feel unhappy, depressed & lonely, facing the reality of your feelings is the 1st step.
It's like having flu. Once you realise you have it, you decide to either live w it or work on getting better.

a) Talk to someone you trust who can tell you what you don't want to hear.
b) Write down your feelings in a journal. Just let it all out. When you expressed it, you'll start to understand y you react the way you do & allow yourself to change.

Finally if the baggage has you mired in such a bad funk that it's affecting your relationships, work & daily life - seek a reputable therapist.

My dear friend, 1 year of mourning is long enough.
It's time to give your soul & body fresh air.

Summarised from a local mag.

Good Morning

2005-10-03T09:59:00.000+08:00

Good morning!
Bright & sunny morning.
I feel the breeze in my face.
Is it the weather or is it because I'm away from work, I'm feeling extremely good this morning :)

While I'm busy blogging, the aircon man is busy trying to figure what happened to my 8 months old aircon!

Very Wrong

2005-10-02T19:37:00.000+08:00

HELP! Something is very wrong w my blog!
1st - all formatting buttons are out of positioning (still unsolved).

Latest - I cant open comments :(

Boo boo what is WRONG!

How boring, I can't even change the text colour!

Any expert out there see this blog, if u know the solution pls help me!

Family Affair

2005-10-02T12:05:00.000+08:00

This was the song that was playing when me, PuccA n TP stepped into Siam Supper Club on Fri (30/9) after Plastic Gun wedding dinner.

Also like this song but never get a chance to know the title.
So I seized the opportunity, went up to the DJ, scribble a note, asked him for the title of the song.

Plastic Gun wedding was quite fun. There're 12 of us in our table.
Two extra were from 2 other tables seperately.
They made a smart choice to 'squeeze' in w us.
Our table was the most exciting one among the 3 tables of colleagues.

We fixed Plastic Gun a special drink only to be bottomed up by his "supporting-die-for-you" brother-in-law. As he was drinking, the whole table screamed "nooooooooooo".
But it seems the more we tried to stop him the faster the drank!

No choice, we (in fact I was the only one mixing..hee) mixed another more power drink for Plastic Gun. We all waited for him to see his guests off to make him drink the glass of 'wine cum beer cum chilli cum pepper cum vinegar cum.....many other stuff'.

As usual there were lots of excuses from the groom for not drinking.
Out of no choice, I have to volunteer to drink a mouth of it to challenge him to drink.
(Actually it tasted like Bloody Mary, I quite like it though, haha)

But lousy Plastic Gun can't take it after drinking only a month.
Then his brother-in-law snatched over & again down the whole glass!

After these two powerful drinks, I'm quite sure his stomach will start stirring before mid-night.
Well, we will only know when we get to see Plastic Gun tomorrow.

75

2005-10-02T00:14:00.000+08:00

75 is the no. of my locker in gym.
2 years ago when I started my gym membership, I have the privilege of choosing the locker no. I want because the gym was newly opening. Most lockers were available then. I would have chosen 73 (my year) if it wasnt that high up (I'm not tall 153 cm), I need a stool to open the locker.

When I stopped my membership end Jul this year, I returned the locker.
When I resumed my membership in Sep, I was told there's a super long queue waiting to have locker. I'm behind 117 people.

My goodness, I cant wait that long! I told the staff.
They've known me for 2 years now, they said they will try to get me a locker since I only terminated my membership for barely a month.

Eagerly I waited for the good news.
Yesterday a staff contacted me, she brought me an exciting news.
They managed to get me a locker and it's not just any locker.
It is my no. 75 Locker!!!
Amazingly the person who took over my locker returned the locker after barely 2 months!

Hurray! This really feels like lost love found!
Really! I'm so so thrilled!

Is the Lord trying to show me something?
Don't wait till you lose something to treasure it?

TCC

2005-10-01T23:59:00.000+08:00

is the place I went for my secondary classmate gathering today.
meowmeow suggested the place because she heard the desserts there are award winning.
but inthe end, none of us had dessert.

meowmeow is going back to texas mid-nov.
this gathering was more like a farewell for her.
most did not make it today.
she was quite disappointed.

we had dinner @ tcc.
wanted to bring her to eat 'zhi cha' but she said she scare hot.
she's less a singaporean now after living in states for a couple of years.

is foreign land really much better than ours?
is the air there fresher?
are the people friendlier?
are the people there smarter?
moon rounder, brighter?

i dont know. i havent stay aboard hence i dont know how i would be come.

among us, meowmeow is considered one of the luckiest, i guess.
married a malaysian engineer was got posted to u.s.
she doesnt need to work, full time housewife, taking care of 2 children.
no worry for $$$, everything is taken care of by hubby's company.

after dinner, meowmeow, song & househusband went drinking.
I left, feel kind of tired.

......

problem w post-create page still not solved.

Problem

2005-10-01T23:43:00.000+08:00

Problem.
Something wrong with my post-create page.
All the comment icons are out of positioning.
Instead of 1 straight line across, now they are all 1 straight line down!
And all the comments such as bolding, italic & text colour are not working.
Emailed blogger support for help, no reply so far :(

WHAT HAPPENED?

8th Anniversary

2005-09-26T21:18:00.000+08:00

8 years ago yesterday, we decided to end our courtship.
We united as husband & wife.
At that time no one gives us any advise on marriage.
We both based on our parents marriage as an example to start ours.
Along the way, there're hiccups. We don't understand why we couldnt agree with each other's perception of marriage.

Now looking back, we both have grown & matured. We've our own expectation of what kind of marriage we want rather than comparing it w our parents'.

Dami brought me to Villa Bali for a simple evening on our 8th anniversary.
I'm more than happy. It doesnt matter where we go what we eat to celebrate this very special day. I'm already v grateful that after all these years, after some of those silly mistakes I've made, we are still growing strong.

I'm indeed blessed! Thank you God.

This Abs

2005-09-24T22:20:00.000+08:00

This is the abs I'm working towards.

For Christmas Party on 25th Dec 2005.

This is my goal for the next 3 months.

An Attitude Of Gratitude

2005-09-24T22:10:00.000+08:00

Being grateful enlarge, enrich & empower life.
Lack of gratitude, most people are blinded to God's gift.
It is not uncommon to meet people who share this same attitude: "What is there to be grateful for?" Which is quite sad.

Quote the following example:

You've an extra movie ticket. You ask a friend, who says, "Why you call me so late? What show it is? Why dont you have tickects for the other show, I'm not so keen on this one. Only one ticket? I want to bring someone. Where is it? So far away? I don't know, it's so troublesome. You come and pick me up, lah"

Completely devoid of gratitude.

An attitude of gratitude can positively affect your self, relationships, even health.
Have a gratitude journal. Every morning write 5 things that we are grateful for & every night write 5 things we are thankful for that happened during that day.

Grateful people not only benefit their mental health. They take of their physical health too.
Gratitude is essential in helping humans cope w stress.
Stress can make us seriously ill, being linked to the leading causes of death like heart disease & cancer.

A grateful heart also corresponds w an optimistic outlook - boosts immune system.
A grateful heart focuses on what it has, not what it lacks.

Summarised from an article in a local mag.

Already There

2005-09-24T21:36:00.000+08:00

"To bring anything into your life, imagine that it's already there"

-Richard Bach-

Imagine

2005-09-24T21:35:00.000+08:00

"Let your imagination run riot, and your life will be a mess.
Control it & you change your life in accordance with your will"

Human Spirit

2005-09-24T21:33:00.000+08:00

Learn from winning & losing.
When you win, you learn to remain humble & to respect your fellow competitors.
When you are defeated, you need to pick yourself up & try harder the next time.

Be totally committed, put in alot of hard work & be prepared to make alot of sacrifices in the process of trying to achieve excellence.

- Annabel Pennefather

What Drives You?

2005-09-24T21:30:00.000+08:00

Is it love, money, power, compassion, fear?
Each one of us is guided by different motivations, some external, some intrinsic.
But external pressures or rewards are never as effective as the impetus that come from within.
Some people call this PASSION.

It is easy to say that one has a passion for this or that.
But passion is, at core, an emotion.
It gives us a reason to act & helps motivate action but it has its peaks & slumps.
You cannot depend on just passion alone to keep a cause going.
Passion can be drained by so many things:
- negative feedback & competing demands & etc..

It is admirable for some to put their passion into action.

To stay motivated, one needs to rekindle this 'feeling' of passion every day.

Read the above from a local mag.

Deprive

2005-09-24T13:50:00.000+08:00

yes i am deprive from blogging!
so many many days no time to blog!
this has been a crazy week!

mon-accompanied apple for eye check-up

tue-boss thinks i'm losing focus @ work. redo my hair colour.

wed-boss had a lousy meeting the day before regarding service level of one of our co appointed partner. bcos of that he asked to do a daily counts for the last 6 mths = Est. 180 days! my eyes were crossed @ the end of every evening! attended wedding dinner @ marriot. dinner started @ 9pm! oh God! Got home @ 12am. dami was hungry but have to wait for me to get home to cook instant mee for him. i suspect i have super natural power that make the noodle tastes nicer....

thu-another day of manual count....ahahah....i feel like pulling my hair off. dept mtg ended late. sudden realise i hv a deadline to rush for the next day, damn! a colleague gave me a ride home but driving @ 70-80km/hr on 3rd lane....zzzzzzzzz..by the time i got home almost 9pm. i was so tired i almost fall asleep while bathing.

fri-whole day was rush rush rush...trying to meet deadline.after work visited momo & kawai w vv. celebrated momo's bday. hobbes v sweet. got momo crabtree & evelyn hamper. she was so touched, almost tear she said. white banana came too. surprise surprise. he even showed bearbear the gold toilet seat pix he took in dubai. comic came too. wow that's another surprise. she hasnt been around for awhile since b4 momo's wedding. by the time we merried; i got home almost 12am......so exhausted! but what's worst, the power shut twice when i tried to on the aircon! SHIT! SHIT! WHY ME? i've to sleep w the fan on instead & dami isnt home w me & my PIL went to cruise. i was home alone...booboo.

i'm deprive from hvin ME time. from jotting down my tots....

Sleepy Post

2005-09-20T23:46:00.000+08:00

@ work:-
What happen when your boss say he thinks you loses focus @ work?
Die liao lor

@ home:-
Every rooms are filled with junks, how?
Siao liao lor

On the street:-
Strong wind & rain start to pour, how I feel?
Christmas lor

@ 11.42pm:-
Why I talk like that?
Sleepy liao lor

Ok - Good night.

p.s. Please pray for a little baby (less than 1 month old) in Spain fighting for her life. Mommy's name is Cyn. She's a friend of mine. Thank you. God Bless you.

Screaming

2005-09-19T21:42:00.000+08:00

Today Momo screamed @ me.
And I screamed back.
I was angry with her for screaming.
I don't know why she has been so short-tempered.
And I really dislike being screamed @.

I spoke to Apple about it.
Apple said she's probably tired & lots of worries + Kawai in hospital + Hobbes not in town.
I understand her stress but I find that she shouldnt always want things her way.

Just like yesterday, she denied asking me to take the magazine from the clinic. I remembered clearly she said it's ok because I was quite reluntant to take the magazines @ 1st worrying it's not right & she reassured me that the magazines are given away free. Our conversation got quite heated up.

On the norm, I would have reacted mildly but when the other party come on to hard, I would react defensively.

Of cos I dont feel good being pissed with her. I just don't know how I can bring it up to her. I'm quite hurt too.....boo boo

Jaundice

2005-09-19T21:29:00.000+08:00

Baby Kawai has Jaundice.
She was admitted to hospital for 1 day.
Tomorrow Momo will bring her home.

Nurse told Momo that Kawai's healthy & active.
She drank lots of milk & poo poo 3x.
Tonight Momo will be able to have a good night rest w/o having to wake up inthe middle of the night.

God please bless little Kawai.

Happy Birthday Pucca

2005-09-19T21:25:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is Pucca's birthday.
She has decided to pamper herself.
Enjoy being a 'tai tai' for a day.
Changing her hairstyle & do madi/padi.

I'm sure she's gonna look beautiful when she return to work on Wed.
A brand new chapter, a brand new image, a brand new mood.
She has listed it down the things she wants to do.
Good girl. There's absolutely no reason why she could not succeed!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Bring It On

2005-09-19T21:18:00.000+08:00

"The best way to make your dream come true is to wake up"

= Thinking positively is the key to change how you respond to negative situations

= See the situation as a challenge rather than a crisis

= It will switch your thoughts to problem-solving rather than problem-obsessing

= When bad times are coming thick & fast, the way through is mind over matter

= When trouble hits & you feel you can't cope, take a deep breath

= Ensure that you, and not your emotions, are in control

= So you must calm down let your "thinking brain start working"

= Restore your self-esteem so you can cope with any setback quickly & effectively

= Shake yourself out of your "Why me?" moment to get things into perspective

= Tell yourself you'll handle it, whatever. It will change your mood instantly

= When you're feeling more in control mentally

= You can maintain this attitude by identifying uplifting things or people in your life

= Changing your environment is crucial - if you're at work - leave the office

= Have lunch/Call a friend

= Once calm down, face the fact, not the reasons behind them

= It's important to look @ what you can learn to help change the way you think forever

= There's always something to be learned, which in turn, will empower you by giving you self-awareness

= Staying positive - In times of trauma, it's easy to slip into your default 'poor me' mode

= Being prepare for the future doesnt mean sitting around & worrying about things that havent happened & probably won't

= Living in the moment & expecting the best means you too, will become one of those 'lucky' people

= The new, positive you is simply prepared for whatever life throws @ you

= Bring it on!

Monday @ Home

2005-09-19T10:31:00.000+08:00

Hmm...another cold wet rainy morning.
Look like it's gonna to rain the whole day today :)
Luckily I took a day off today; I can pretty much enjoy the cold air from outside the window now while creating this post.

Momo is bring Kawai out for the 1st time since returning home from hospital. Kawai is going for her 1st injection. Oh...poor thing, hope she would cry too much.

Bearbear took leave too. Hence it's gonna be a family outing again haha except morning he will drive Momo to clinic & after to NUH w Apple & me.

Wonder has the Noel staff make the delivery to our office already. Tempted to call back office.....

Mooncake Festival

2005-09-18T22:50:00.000+08:00

Bearbear & Apple are very happy that we went over for dinner tonight.
It's the 1st time Dami see Kawai. I could see his joy too :)

All of us were happily enjoying dinner together except for Hobbes who's far away in Switzerland for business trip.

Tomorrow have to accompany Apple for her eyes check-up @ NUH. I've taken 1 day off.

Saw Pucca's blog, seems like she needed more time to recover from the wound that deeply hurt her. I really wish I could do more or know more on how I could support her.

Two days ago, I heard from Momo that 1 of our friend who has recently given birth in early Sep. Her baby was almost 2 months pre-mature. Doctor found a vein that's connecting blood circulation isn't fully developed. Afraid that the lack of blood circulation might damage the baby's brain, she was operated 3 days after birth. The doctor can only tell whether there's any brain damage 14 days after the ops.

I felt sad hearing the news. I know how much pain a parent has to go through to see their little one suffer. As I look @ Kawai, so small & frail, I just want to do all the best to protect & love her.

I can only pray for my friend in Spain that her daughter would be fine.

Dami's leg is recovering. He has gone out to meet his pal for a drink @ Villa Bali.
I'm @ home watching my fav show, CSI. I was alittle upset that my dream of being a mom didnt come true this month. I want to take a break. I'm quite affected each time it occur. As the months passes, my disappointment increased. I dont think Dami feels how I feel. But I dont to over stress him by constantly showing him my disappointment.

Afterall there's nothing much he can do beside quitting smoking & cut drinking. I better leave it to GOD.

Now the radio is playing "Last Kiss" by Pearl Jam. It reminds me of that evening I went drinking w Foong Foong @ East Side.

No matter what, I'm still counting my blessings. Thank you God for everything I have & enjoy & experience today. Thank you!

Happy Mooncake Festival.
Bearbear said "next mooncake festival, Kawai can carry lantern le" haha, happy grand-dad!

Wash Hair Anyone?

2005-09-18T13:59:00.000+08:00

Article in Urban - 8 Sep 05

About of 3 women who do not wash their hair - oh I mean they have someone to wash for them. All the 3 women stopped washing their own hair for more than 10 over years (the longest is 28 years).

One of them is a customer service officer who has thick long hair, in her late 20s spend $300 monthly to have her hair wash twice a week (with our super hot weather in S'pore, how can one endure not washing hair for more than 2 days?)

The other two in early 40s (a managing director - $240 monthly & a housewife whose husband is a banker - $800 monthly)

One of them even quoted: "Under no circumstances would I wash my own hair. I'll asked the salons to open extra early or extra late to accommodate my schedule." Hmm... I wonder why not hire a maid who knows how to do hairstyling??

It really got me thinking....there are people out there who are struggling just to have 3 meals a day & there are those who dont even know how to handle the hair GOD gave them.....?

Full Life

2005-09-18T10:28:00.000+08:00

Last night while clearing some old newspaper, I came across this article:
Giving myself a makeover

Writer talked about a man struck twice by catastrophic accidents - reinvent himself.
Jim MacLaren is his name.
At age 22, he met w a motorbike accident & ended up w one leg amputated.
He didnt let that get him down.
Fitted w a false leg, he continue participating in sports that even most normal people like us find it tough to complete - swim 4km, run 42km & cycle 112km.
Not wonder he was known as Ironman athlete.

But God put him thru another test @ the age of 30.
While he was cycling in an Ironman race, he was hit by a van driven by an old man going in the wrong direction.

This time, he paralysed from the neck down.
MacLaren could have chosen to retreat into self-pity after he became a quadriplegic, he didnt. He didnt waste his time getting angry w other people if they either studiously avoided looking @ him or stared rudely @ him.

6 mths after he broke his neck, he was living on his own in an apartment & plotting how to reinvent himself to get on w the business of productive living.

Now he had set up a charity foundation, become a motivational speaker.

As he said: "What is a full life? Do I have to get there on foot? Or can I find some other path?"

For most of us (me especially) always complaining life is tough. But really, is life really that tough or we simply surrender w/o putting up a good fight? For me, I know my ans is the latter.

Article from ST 7 Sep 05 - Writer Keng Fatt

Rainy Morning

2005-09-18T10:02:00.000+08:00

[ I love rainy day, be it morning, afternoon or night
[ I love the chill air in my face
[ I love the warm feeling underneath my clothes
[ I'm always in good mood when it rains
[ I don't understand why most people hate rainy day
[ Maybe that's part of the reason why I love London
[ It was towards the end of the rainy season
[ The road were constantly wet
[ We would hop-in to sideway cafe
[ Enjoyed a cup of hot drink
[ While watching the rest of the world passes-by

Torn

2005-09-16T12:27:00.000+08:00

Torn is one of my fav song.
Torn was released in 97.
Torn was made famous by Natalie Imbruglia
Torn is the 5th song in Fantastic Females Album I bought in 99.
Torn's MTV is one of those I will never forget.
Torn is the song that's playing on the radio now.
Torn always remind me of the car accident on 22 March 03.
Torn brings flashback.

Arrgggggg...............................Torn Torn Torn

Dami's Injured Leg

2005-09-16T11:55:00.000+08:00

Dami injured his leg while working in KL.
Poor thing, he returned home with swollen leg.
It must be really painful he almost couldn't walk.
He was already asleep when I got home last night after visiting Momo.

He went to work this morning for an important meeting.
Called him twice to go see doctor.
Don't know whether will he do it later or not.
Sometime he's too stubborn.
He would rather let it heal by itself, bearing all the pain......

Haizzz.....very worry.

Babe of the Year

2005-09-15T15:53:00.000+08:00

To The World:

This is Little Momo - Minutes after birth.

She's the little princess in our family now.

She's so irresistible.

We are all crazy over her!

Hurt

2005-09-15T01:20:00.000+08:00

Is it true what you DON'T know WON'T hurt you?

Who would want to be a FOOL?

I have two thoughts about it.

Ask someone who ever had unfaithful partner & when they discovered the truth, they would probably say they are glad to know the truth earlier so they can choose to move-on.

Then ask someone who ever had partner who left them w/o giving any reason, they would probably still wondering why? Thinking over & over again what had happened, what went wrong & continue searching for answers that they might never find.

Either way it hurt.

The one who know the truth might kept dwelling on the past & get stuck, the other who doesnt know what happened has lesser emotional burden to let go & move-on with life.

You might say it's the ATTITUDE that makes the difference.

I totally agree.

It's how we handle the 'HURT' feeling that decide whether we get stuck or we have closed a chapter in our lives & open a Brand new chapter.

I pray for my dear friend (u know who u are) that HOPE will replace HURT in no time.

p.s. And hurt is when you discovered all that you've typed got erased for no reason & have to re-key-in all over again!!!!

Kawai

2005-09-14T23:41:00.000+08:00

Kawai is the word to describe my little niece.
My eyes got teary when I first saw her.
I get more & more emotional as I aged.

I carried her, I felt the warm.
I kept smiling to her.
I'm sure Momo & Hobbes are 100 times happier.

Though she's an average size kodomo, she certainly has powerful lungs.
Her cry is short, loud & sharp.
Jenny, Rara, VV & Sinful Man were there.
Kingkong & Natasha left earlier.

We're all so eager to take her pix.
HP camera, digital camera, video cam....
We even forward the pix to each other thru MMS.
Kawai is really the superstar.

Almost 8.30 we left for dinner.
Apple, Bearbear & Didi, we went Bt Timah Food Centre for dinner.
Saw Kenneth the agent but he didnt see me. He was busy looking around for food & talking on his mobile.
Then met Mr. & Mrs. Professional Pretentious Actors......sian!
Mrs. PPA's hair was so ugly.....My God!